The eye of the storm

August 7, 2009

When the storm abates, when the calm claims stake, nothing is as it seems. The easiness with it that it brings, makes the reprieve ever so welcome, just as any state of mind it seems to appear on its own yet as time and experience have shown, this is not so. All are part of the skills and strategies learned, instinctually, voluntarily or both.

Usually the calm occurs right after a tumultous experience or set of experiences. The cast of which may be ever changing, but the roles nonetheless only bear all to familiar faces from the past.

What is the essence of self, why have I been living the way I have, thinking the way I am? I often had instances where it seemed I’d awakened from a metaphoric slumber and wondered where I am or who I am. It never lasts long, like chequered mats revolving to display the next ad or message in a giant billboard as you drive by, the moment is gone and hardly ever seen or thought of again.

Every person is born the same, borne of unawareness and slowly building, fulfilling breadths of existence as if it were meant to be. Whether it is the artist carving the figurine from the block of wood or if the wood molding the artist is a question which seems to loop and prevail, each perspective as valid and sentient as the other.

Why is it that we seem to be blinded to this, and why does it seem more natural and sensible when I am caught in this state of questioning than when we are in the waking world with it’s artificial laws and restrictions and compliances. A being aware of itself in a higher state, all these questions and so little answers, seems so far removed from the daily rigors and robotic routines and thought patterns seemingly instilled in everyone of us as we go through what we’ve come to know and accept as living. From a higher sense that muted, unquestioning, relegatory existence seems as unrewarding, unregarding as a self-subjugated ant fulfilling the cumulative goal of its colony.

Does the ant know what it’s doing or that it might be watched by a higher entity, namely us humans who are so aware of ourselves. Do we realise that our actions and paths might be similar to ants in seemingly similar predisposed paths, conditioned and acclimatized not to wander or question too much?

The Pioneer plaque.
Image via Wikipedia
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